Project Hope Coaching Tips
"I expect to pass through this life but once. If therefore, there can be any kindness I can show, or any good thing I can do to a fellow human being, let me do it now."
William Penn
"It is God himself who has made us what we are and given us new lives from Christ Jesus; and long ages ago he planned that we should spend these lives helping others."
Ephesians 2:10
Ok, I’m a coach! Now what?
Know that you are having an influence each and every time you have contact with your family! So, strive to be a good example!
Your challenge is to encourage, support and teach the Scholarship Recipient by sharing your gifts and your talents. You will be working with individuals and families that want to change. Every family is different and has its own issues and obstacles that seem to get in the way of success. Some of these obstacles may be large and very difficult to overcome, while others may not be so overwhelming. But, any obstacle is a challenge for the individual trying to achieve change.
This is a very exciting but scary time for the family. They may be embarrassed about asking for help, and about their lack of skills. They also may have difficulty trusting others. So remember, you are an instrument for change and your job is extremely important.
Please know that if you ever need guidance or assistance don’t hesitate contact the program director and/or other coaches. We all learn from each other.
Materials that you will need each time you meet with your family
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Personal calendars - remind family that they are expected to bring theirs as well. Before you leave, be sure to review time and place of next meeting- make sure both of you record it in your calendars- this way there is no confusion about when you are meeting next. This is a great opportunity for modeling! Some of our families may not have good organizational skills- so this is a great learning experience!
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Your "Project Hope Notebook"- all you need is a spiral or notebook where you can take notes-jot down dates of meetings- who was present, what you worked on, any homework (for you or the Scholarship recipient), any questions you might have for other coaches or director. A "Project Hope Form" is available to coaches if preferred.
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Any follow-up information or workbooks
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A positive attitude! It’s catchy!
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Good Practices
God has given each of you some special abilities; be sure to use them to help each other, passing on to others God’s many kinds of blessings.
1 Peter 4:10
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Treat others with dignity and respect.
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Meet with scholarship recipient according to contract (# of times per week & agreed upon place).
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Be consistent.
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Be punctual- if someone is late- please address it! This is not a good habit for your team to get into. It wastes everyone’s time and does not help the family to get into good routine. This is good practice in the work place as well. Families need to understand that to be successful in the workplace, you must be reliable and dependable- that includes punctuality!
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Be honest. If you don’t think someone is making a good choice- ask him/her about it! Talk about making good decisions, problem solving, try to understand the situation more clearly to ensure that good decisions are being made. Families are involved in the program because they want to learn and make positive changes in their lives. But, they are adults and can make their own decisions. They just may have deal with the consequences. Many times, the mistakes that people make and the consequences that they have to deal with are huge learning opportunities! The difficulty that we may have is not bailing them out of the consequence each time!
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Give encouraging words and praise. At times, it may be difficult to find a positive but look for the positive and help to build hope for a new way of life.
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Be human. Don’t act like you know it all! We are all striving to do the best we can but we all have challenges! Let you family know that you struggle at times as well.
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Open or close each meeting with a prayer. If you are not comfortable with coming up with a prayer on demand. Plan a few words to say each week so you will get more comfortable.
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Getting to Know each other
"Give more honor to others than to yourselves. Do not be interested only in your own life, but be interested in the lives of others."
Philippians 2:3-4
"Clothe yourselves with humility toward one another because God opposes the proud, but give grace to the humble."
1 Peter 5:5
The first few meetings you will be getting to know each other- share experiences, family, work, personal information (only things that you feel comfortable sharing)- you will find out what things you have in common, learn many interesting things from your scholarship family, learn how you might be of further assistance and you might even learn something about yourself.
But, remember that you are there to accomplish the goals that the family has set for themselves so be sure to use your time efficiently. Talk about the tasks to be completed and explore methods of learning that might be helpful. Help identify any resources (books, videos, tapes) that you might want to use with your family and let program director assist you with locating the resource.
Avoid making judgments
"Remember that the temptations that come into your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will keep the temptation from becoming so strong that you can’t stand up against it. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you will not give in to it."
1 Corinthians 10:13
Help families to know that we’ve all made mistakes and that is how we learn- encourage them to forgive themselves for those mistakes and to not repeat them- their future is bright if they trust in God’s plan and make good choices.
Some of the issues that your family has dealt with may be familiar while others may be unfamiliar. If your scholarship family shares something that could be upsetting to you- such as prior physical or sexual abuse issues, prior drug abuse or other hardships that they may have been through, be sure to "put on your poker face." Don’t look surprised by the information being shared or act like they are to be pitied. Be sure to be sensitive and supportive. Tell them that they are truly breaking the cycle and they should be very proud of themselves. Ask if they have received counseling for the issue and/or if they might be interested in seeking counseling now. Be sure to let program director know about the situation to locate appropriate resources.
Tell families that they deserve "good things" in their life. Especially, those who are constantly struggling with the choices that they make- some people have difficulty believing that they deserve "good things." There may have been abuse issues in the past- often they can have a great impact on future life expectations and life choices.
Keep Updated
"Keep on growing in your knowledge and understanding."
Philippians 1:9
"Be sure to use the abilities God has given you.. Put these abilities to work; throw yourselves into your tasks so that everyone may notice your improvement and progress."
1Timothy 4:14-15
Review and know the Project Hope contract- You will be given specific goals that the scholarship recipient has identified as a need to learn more about, i.e. parenting, interviewing skills, or developing faith life for the family. As you get to know the family, the goals will become more specific. We will update and change goals as things change. It’s a good idea to write down new goals identified and let program director know so we can also change the contract.
Please talk to the Project Hope Program Director for ideas and materials to help you. Also, feel free to research your own materials that you think will be helpful with your family- you will get to know your families very well and this will help determine needs- just let director know and we can purchase materials. Your families may be interested in certain books or materials so let this direct your team as well if appropriate. New materials could be helpful to other families as well!
Discuss issues each week with your family utilizing materials- you can give "homework" or just go over the materials during you time together- be realistic about the amount of "homework" you give- remember that they may be managing school, work and children. This is a balancing act- you need to give enough that will help the family to continue to make progress but not be overwhelming and unmanageable.
Burning Issues
"We do not deal much in facts when we are contemplating ourselves."
Mark Twain
Feel free to deviate from the materials from time to time- it’s difficult to concentrate on something else when there may be a pressing issue that is on the families’ mind- it’s helpful to address those issues before trying to work on something else. It’s better to help problem solve and encourage Scholarship Recipient to make good choices. You may need to consult the Program Director and/or research the issue. There may be a need for a referral to another resource. There is a book of local resources in the Director's office.
Cares and Concerns
"I will never leave you nor forsake you."
Joshua 1:5
"Our present troubles are quite small and won’t last very long. Yet, they produce for us an immeasurably great glory he will give us later."
2 Corinthians 4:17
Each week, ask about cares and concerns. Include these requests in your prayers and pass on to any of your prayer groups. Let the family know that they will be in your prayers and others will be praying for them. Know that much of the information is private so be respectful of their privacy. Be sure to follow up with the scholarship family- so they will feel your support. If there is any question regarding a need for therapy or a referral, please let the program director know immediately so appropriate resources can be located.
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